Headlines that should not be headlines

So they're not exactly headlines, but they are on my Yahoo homepage and they jump out at me. They are the popular searches and Yahoo basically screams for me to look at what everyone else is looking at too. Here are some examples of what people have been most interested in over the past week:

1. Swine Flu- who the hell is still worried about that? No, seriously, who still is freaking out about it? Why? I think I've said this before - the flu is the flu. I'm guessing that people are still freaked out because there are now different strains of the swine flu. Does this sound familiar? It should. We go through this shit every year. Different names for the same shitty little virus.
   
2. The "New Moon" Movie - for those fortunate enough not to know what this is, it's the sequel to the movie "Twilight." This is the perfect example of how stupid news reaches me, no matter how much I try to avoid it. I avoided "Twilight" like the plague (or swine flu haha!) and yet, I know that there are going to be two abysmal movies made after it. Thank God I never actually saw the movie. Ugh.
3. Kate Gosselin - nobody cares about her. I'm not even kidding. The people who were searching for her must have accidentally spelt someone's name wrong, because nobody in their right mind would even remember to care about her. Her/her husband's show is basically over, which is good, because all it did was reward people for having 8 kids. Anyone can do that.
4. The Octomom - the fact that someone actually gave that woman a show is beyond comprehension. Worse yet is that people are going to condone her by watching her show, which makes me want to vomit. I could do an entire separate rant on her, but she doesn't deserve it. She makes me angry enough to spit, and use flamethrowers on people.
5. A Pole Dancing Doll - um? I can't comment on this, I just found it interesting that such a toy was created. I'm going to guess there were a bunch of angry parents ranting about it, which is probably why it was a popular search.
6. Sex and the City 2 - I can't say this enough, but seriously, who fucking cares? A stupid show now has a second movie being made. Goody!
   

I find anything from scientificamerican.com far more interesting. I have to go read something from there, all of these shitty headlines have made my eyeballs dry up and pop like ... poppy things.

~musicalsparks